When an NHL season is streaking by as quickly as this 2021 campaign has, one might need a little break from sports every now and then. A hockey palate cleanser, if you will. For me, that’s come in the form of the new Marvel television series that’ve been arriving on Disney+; starting with WandaVision, that went from January to early March, and now Falcon and the Winter Solider, which premiered on Friday.
But comic superhero movies and shows actually have a lot in common with hockey as it is. They’re action-packed, filled with drama that doesn’t mean much in the grand scheme of things, and incredibly quippy. Or at least, that’s what it seems like from watching Canucks Twitter every day.
Superheroes – and a lot of hockey players – might seem like overpowered demigods destined for greatness from the outside. But in reality they’re often the creators of their own worst enemies, committed to a cause they might not always believe in and above all, infallibly human. If victory was always a guarantee, where would the drama be in that?
This North Division has been chalked full of stories just like the ones that play out in a Kevin Feige production. Teams realizing their full potential might not be enough, taking their lumps from everyone across the board and looking for the spark that’ll get them to the endgame.
Maybe that’ll arrive in the form of a new hero at the upcoming Trade Deadline, or someone in the farm system waiting for his big chance. But one team is going to will their way to the first (and only) all-Canadian division title, so this week I assigned them each the Marvel character they remind me of most.
If there were 14,000,605 possible outcomes, can any of these seven teams find the one where they win it all?
1) Edmonton Oilers ⬆️ 3
Thor. We have two of the mightiest powers, but everyone likes our brother better.
2) Vancouver Canucks ⬆️ 5
Spider-Man. We’re naïve, win a lot more battles than we should, and end up creating our own demons far too often.
3) Montreal Canadiens ⬆️ 6
Iron Man. A legacy member with an “only I know the right call” attitude that seems to get us in trouble more often than it helps.
4) Winnipeg Jets ⬇️ 2
Captain America. We could say it’s because we’re a complete unit, inoffensive and stronger than we look, but it’s really just cause our logo looks like his shield.
5) Toronto Maple Leafs ⬇️ 2
Vision. We’re supposed to be unbeatable, but then we barely do anything for years and get taken out. Several times.
6) Ottawa Senators ⬆️ 7
We’re Thanos, cause we plan on eliminating half the division’s head coaches.
7) Calgary Flames ⬇️ 4
The Human Torch. Not because we’re the Flames, just cause you’re still waiting to see a good version of us.
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